Oy, I Forgot the Title: Dementia Signs That Aren't Just "Where Are My Glasses?"

A Lighthearted but Serious Look at the Early Warning Signs Worth Watching For

Let's be honest: in a Jewish family, forgetting things is practically a cultural tradition. Bubbe has called every grandchild by the wrong name since 1987, and Uncle Morty still can't find his reading glasses (they're on his head). So how do you know when forgetfulness is just being human versus something worth a trip to the doctor?

Here's the surprising part: the earliest signs of dementia often have nothing to do with memory. Take mood, for example. If your normally kvetchy father suddenly stops complaining about the thermostat, the neighbors, and the price of brisket, that silence may be worth noticing. Apathy—a genuine loss of interest in the things someone has always loved—is easy to mistake for "he's just tired" or "she's in a mood."

Then there's judgment. We're not talking about Aunt Sheila buying a third set of Passover dishes—that's just normal. We mean genuinely concerning decisions: falling for phone scams, neglecting personal hygiene, or forgetting how to make the kugel she's prepared every Rosh Hashanah for the past forty years. When the recipe that seems to live in someone's hands suddenly disappears, it's worth paying attention.

Language changes can be another clue. Pausing frequently to find words, substituting incorrect words, or losing the thread of a conversation midway through can sometimes signal a larger issue. And we're not talking about the charming "let me start from when I was a girl in Poland" story that takes ninety minutes to reach the point.

Spatial difficulties can also emerge early. Someone may begin getting lost on familiar routes or struggle to judge distances accurately. These changes are often blamed on needing new glasses—which, once again, may still be sitting on top of their head.

Sleep disturbances and an unsteady, shuffling gait can also be associated with certain forms of dementia. Other warning signs may include difficulty managing everyday tasks, balancing a checkbook, following the plot of a television show, or remembering whether the cholent has been simmering since Thursday—or last Tuesday.

Before the entire family declares an emergency at Shabbat dinner, it's important to remember that none of these symptoms alone means someone has dementia. Stress, medication side effects, thyroid disorders, vitamin deficiencies, and many other treatable medical conditions can produce similar symptoms. That's why it's important to consult an actual healthcare professional—not WebMD, and not your cousin who "read something on Facebook."

The good news, kayn ayn hora? Early action can make a meaningful difference. Regular exercise, staying socially engaged (you're Jewish—you may already be overscheduled), managing conditions such as high blood pressure and diabetes, and keeping the mind active all support long-term brain health.

Most importantly, the sooner concerns are evaluated, the more options may be available. Many of today's therapies and interventions are most effective when started early.

Families are often the first to notice subtle changes. Trust your instincts. Keep track of patterns, ask questions, and schedule an evaluation if concerns arise. A little awareness—and maybe a bowl of soup—can go a long way.

The Brain Health Center

Englewood Office
401 South Van Brunt Street, Suite 302
Englewood, NJ 07631
Phone: (201) 947-4777

Suffern Office
2 Executive Boulevard, Suite 103
Suffern, NY 10901
Phone: (845) 889-5088